There is a trend of choosing not to have children. I get it. I know the work, the stress, the money, the time and energy it takes. I also can’t judge someone’s horrific childhood and being afraid they will become a monster themselves. But, if you are in the first camp and think that dogs are better, easier , and cheaper than children, I would like you to reconsider.
I had two “savor moments” in the past few days. My adult daughters, who are living with us and working remotely, were having a girls’ night, making cookies and watching a movie together. We came in from being gone and were chatting, when our missionary called for his second call of the week, allowed during this time of Covid restrictions. It was a magical moment that spontaneously happened, our three children laughing together, Cameron delighting his sisters with his humor and stories. I became aware in the middle of it, as an observer looking in and said to myself, “This is why I had children.”
A night later we were having our annual Halloween dinner, on a smaller scale. No extended family and we had fewer trick-or-treaters, by half. My husband kept calling it, “Shalloween”. At the end of the night, when candy swapping was going on, we were sitting in a circle, just in our living room, just a basic holiday get-together and again, I felt a surge of gratitude, “This is why I had children!”
President Gordon B. Hinckley said:
“Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he’s been robbed. Most putts don’t drop. Most beef is tough. Most children grow up to be just people. Most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration. Most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is like an old time rail journey–delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride. “
Being in tune with “savor moments” helps me focus on “the beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed”, and not remember all of the work, stress, etc., it took to get to those savor moments. Just seeing one of my children’s sport’s picture or a scout sash can send me into spasms–as in “How did I do that?”
Now in my 60’s, I am absolutely thanking the Lord that I made that choice to have children, and, thanking Him for the ride.